He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
