this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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