drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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