No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
