Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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