dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
