he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize