whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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