Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
