I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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