who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
