Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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