whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize