it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
We had to coat check the pizza.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
