So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
