how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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