2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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