Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
