I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
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