I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
