I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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