You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
barbara walters just said penis...
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
