yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
