You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
you never un-have a 4some
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
