Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
What happened to fro yo and sex?
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
