I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Send help, water and tortillas.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
