My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Randomize
