I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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