Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize