i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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