I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
