after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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