FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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