Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
