We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
operation have a gay friend backfired
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
as a side note pls kill me
Randomize
