Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
