oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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