Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Randomize
