My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
