What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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