doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
home. puking in laundry basket.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Randomize
