I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
