Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
