Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
