i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
