you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Randomize
