Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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