I can't watch pbs sober anymore
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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