It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
How external is "for external use only"?
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
