So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
She told me I should be a condom model.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
