Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
